Wednesday, June 24, 2015

Gamer with a lady... Oh yeah...


Reread that title and imagine I said that in a sexy voice and not my normal yinnzer, white trashy, accent. Trust me on that. So I have GF and she is a real life one too! Whoopy do right? Alot of gamers have spouses/wives/partners/donkeys/real dolls, so what's the big deal.


Well the big deal is that one my GF is hot. Two I got into 40k after we had dated for a couple years. See I didn't war game when she met me. I played RPGs but not tabletop stuff.  So its been a big adjustment for her. I didn't RPG that much maybe once every 2 months or so and it certainly didn't require the money and time this hobby does.

She's so unlucky... Like Kyle's dice!! She's purdy...
She at first was like "umm ok its weird" but now she is much more supportive because she sees the creative outlet it gives me. It is a way for me to decompress and veg out in a positive way. The hobby is my creative outlet. Without my life would be worse.

See I'm a angry guy. I hate. Alot. Like alot. Ok pretty much a monsoon of rage. See this comes from my days as a US Marine and a emotionally repressed male. I try to offset that rage with exercise and the hobby. That's another thing that the GF finds so odd about my involvement with Wargaming. See I'm a prick. I have zero real friends. No one can stand me. What is this psychobabble rant I'm on? Moving on... Yuck... Self reflection is gross.

So I'm angry, I have a hot GF and I war game. See my GF knows me as the angry, spiteful, Marine, with muscles. She doesn't see me as a dork. It's been a adjustment for her. The first time she saw me move little men and roll dice I think she died a little inside. This wasn't the guy who got the cops called on him as he threw her ex husbands lawn furniture and hockey equipment all over his yard as I behaved like a "epileptic gorilla". All because he called her a name. I know I'm soooo mature for my age... 38. It's embarrassing.

The first time my GF actually complimented my painting, I mean really said "that's really cool honey", was a huge breakthrough for us.
I was pretty proud of that, she went to art school and I'm have the artistic talent of a well "sociopath, Marine, with poor anger management skills".

The first time she watched a batrep I wont lie she might have cackled in my face for 18 minutes. Kinda brutal watching a wine drunk woman destroy your hobby and make light of the countless hours you spend on plastic miniatures. But she's really pretty and helps you realize that you can't take anything too serious in this life, because then you'll throw lawn furniture and stuff....

She loves to refer to my buddy Kyle as my boyfriend and she is totally implying a gay relationship. Before you get all butthurt and accuse her of behaving like the state of Indiana please understand, in May we went to Mexico with 5 of the gayest men to walk the streets of Pittsburgh. That's funny to her and I. Besides all my 40k buddies and I engage in homoerotic orgy of grey sex toys and super glue for lube. Holy cow that's graphic. I'm sure they'll edited that out. I think I'm trying to saying we aren't homophobes nothing like over compensation right????

She's cool with it though. She makes fun of it but its no different then how I make terribly inopportune jokes at every situation. It keeps us close. She has her whore train wreck friends and I have my fellow geeks.

Lastly, I have a busy mind. I get easily distracted by things. The hobby helps center me. Helps keep me on track. The GF sees this as the mist important part of it all. I'm not out l looking for "distractions" (tramps) because the hobby is more interesting. I have a reputation of being what medical doctors call "loose".  This was a huge hurdle when we first started dating. Can she trust me? Will I be faithful? Now she doesn't sweat that. She sees the herd of virgins I play war games with and realizes that no girl is gonna bust the cobwebs of their genitals.  So the hobby has certainly helped us there.

See you around the way....

Saturday, June 13, 2015

Space marine Formations review... WHOA WTF IS THIS SKYHAMMER THING!!!Part 1

So real quick let me give a shout out to both my fans. Opps I forgot I don't have any. So I have the SM dex and I think a review of the formations is much needed. I'll cover chapter tactics too but the formations are where the meat will be, if there is any meat that is. Units didn't change alot outside of some price drops, scouts are BS/WS 4, vehicles can be taken as squadrons(and have rocking benefits) and grav cannons can be taken by tacts now. That's really it unit wise. On to the good stuff!! I'll be rating the formations of a scale of 1-5 Nostramen Chainglaives,
1 NCG -If you take this you already lost....
2 NCG- OHH you did it for fluff reasons that's cute
3 NCG- Obligatory you likely had to take it and were ok with it
4 NCG- Ohh someone is trying to win....
5 NCG- Just take a death star and get it over with I know what you are trying to do Kevin!!!(I actually don't know a Kevin)


Formations:
Galdius Strike Force
The main formation is a Gladius Strike Force and it must contain a demi-company and another axillary formation. Nice benefits from it you can use each of the combat doctrines once per game (which stack with UM!!) and if you take 2 demi-companies you get free transports, for any unit that can take one. YAY!!! You must pay for upgrades though. Its nice though, the bare minimum it will cost you (without upgrades mind you) is 334 for the D-C (demi-company) and 10th company task force (3-5 units of scouts) which will run you 165. So 499 for the GSF (Gladius Strike Force) minimum. That leaves alot of room for upgrades in a 1850 list. So the "Decurian" style is for sure here to stay. I like it. Let me break down the rest though instead of me jabbering my cock holster. I rate this 2-5 depending on the auxiliary formations and if you take a 2nd D-C.

Demi-Company
So we have seen the big boy so lets chat about the formations to make up your formations to make up your detachments to field for your army so you can play. I know that was a obnoxious thing to do but I think you liked it. OK D-C consists of 1 captain/chaplain, 0-1 command squad, 3 (min and max) tact squads, 1 either assault, bike, attack bike, land speeder or assault centurions, 1 either devastators or centurion squad and finally 0-1 of any type of dread. Jeez got all that. This formation gets ObSec and the ability to use the Tactical Doctrine once per game (remember they stack uses so its actually good). Now double that up and take a auxiliary formation and now FREE TRANSPORTS!! I know, I know you're saying "Hey you just said that"! I am aware but it frigging rules! That's a minimum of 6 free pods, rhinos or razorbacks and a max of 10! FREE!!! FREE!!! Rating 3 unless you take 2 then I give it a 4!

This is for Kyle....
Anti-Air Defense Force
It consists of 1 unit of hunters and a min squad of 2 stalkers. If the Hunter hits anything flying the stalkers get +1 BS to hit the same target. EHHH... EHHH... Now keep this tidbit in mind a unit of three stalkers gives you ignores cover. That doesn't suck. Now remember all three will be shooting at the same target. Its a squadron. Its solid but not game breaking.Gonna run you a minimum of 220 it looks like. I give it 1. I don't see it as better then 3 Stalkers.

1st Company Task Force
So this is 3-5 units of either Terminators, Assault Termies, Sternguard or Vanguard Vets in any combo. They get fear, fearless and all get preferred enemy against 1 unit selected at game beginning and any unit within 12" of  3 units get a -2 to their leadership. If you play Imperial Fists or Ultra Marines you will be re rolling 1's usually anyways. I give this a 2 and a 3 if you take Sternguard because they don't suck. This is one of the choices I would maybe use for my auxiliary requirement if I was running a GSF.

Strike Force Ultra. 
Just hold on, because this is one misleading formation. It looks awesome at first then you read it again... Here goes its 1 Terminator Captain, 2 Termi squads, 2 Assault Termi squads, 1 Venerable Dread, 1 Stromraven, 1 Land Raider Crusader or Redeemer. Its like almost 1200 points. They start coming in on turn 1 like normal reserves but per unit still, deep striking or disembarking termies get +1 shot for shooting weapons. Assault termies get +1 attack when disembarking. At first glance I was like whoa!!! Then I was like oh yeah storm bolters still suck. I give this 1 NCG if you take this formation its because you either really like fluff or you just don't know that you suck at playing 40k.

Reclusiam Command Squad
1 Chaplain and 1 Command Squad must be in a Razorback and the chappy cant leave the squad. Gets Crusader and any unit within 6" gets to re-roll all misses in the first round of CC. Shut the front door this blows. I am giving this -3 NCG's if you see someone playing this please snap a pic or video and share it on you tube so we can ridicule them to suicide.

10th Company Force
3-5 Scout squads or Scout Bike squads, 0-1 SGT Telion and any bike units must have cluster mines.
I really like this. Scouts are only 55 points and have a lot of options and USR's for that cost. Ohhh and they are BS/WS 4 again!! This is good. It gives you stealth if you deployed via infiltrate on the first game turn. Lasts until you move, run, charge, fall back or turbo boosts at all. That's right lasts the entire game until you move. Also gives you precision shots on the first game turn. Ehh. I like stacking stealth with either camo cloaks. This is a cheap formation though with a lot of benefits. This is a rock solid 4 NCG's to me. Fills out that auxiliary requirement for the GSF and leaves you a lot of points leftover.

Skyhammer your mamma formation:
That's the first 6 I'll do the next 6 tomorrow but let me cover a little tidbit leaking out today. The Skyhammer Formation went up for sale today. Yeah its not in the codex. Its a web exclusive.
Its 2 Drop Pods, 20 Devastators and 20 Assault Marines. Check it out here... Skyhammer and your dead... So you decide the turn it comes on to begin the game. Then the turn it comes on it gets these shitty command benefits....Dev's get RELENTLESS  and you take a super pinning test on 3D6... still with me? Remember those Assault Marines? Yeah they can charge the turn they deep strike. If they charge one of the units you super pinned they to RE-ROLL FAILED HITS AND WOUNDS ERMAGERWD!! Wow that's subtle GW's real subtle. That's really strong. Its not the be all end all like some want you to think it is but for sure it is damn good. Real quick you kit each unit of 5 Dev's with Grav Cannons at 35 each (245 total with pod) then take 5 man Assault units for 110 (jump packs and a PF on the Sgt). Why 5 man? Well if you have 32 mm bases deep striking 10 of them in is a real pain. Still though I'd take the formation just to have deep striking, RELENTLESS dev's. The grav cannons will do work!! That's 20 grav shots at 24". That would erase a Wraithknight (11.67 AP2 wounds to be exact) or 4.14 Immobilized results (which is actually 7 HP due the immobilized stacking) to any vehicle. That would wreck most anything in the game. So yeah that's pretty good. I ordered three sets...

See you around the way...








Wednesday, June 10, 2015

When a new dex drops...

The Baskin Robbins of 40k armies

We as a community have a real tendency to spazz. If its too good we hurl screams of OP, BS, rage quit, table flip,nonsense. If it isn't good enough we hurl screams of UP, BS, rage quit, table flip,nonsense. Either way we only have one reaction usually. If you play the army your pumped. If you don't its fire from the skies.

Breathe.... Take another one. Ok take one more. As I write this the dex is leaking all over the web. I see a lot of good and little bad.


Some highlights so far to me.
1. 2 X Demi-Company is the truth. Base formation is like 1050 points and now you get all free transports. I think that rocks.
2. Scouts got WS/BS 4. Nice.
3. Vindy, Pred, Whirlwind, Thunderfire Cannon squads have all nice rules if you have 3 of them. Very nice.
4. Dreads in squads!! Wait no they still are just average...
5. Ultra Marines chapter tactics and Black Templar too. Holy smokes.
6. Cents got cheaper. They didn't need that however.
7. Termies cheaper. Sadly wont matter though.
8. The power level looks solid at first glance.
9. Mother frigging Grav weapons everywhere now.
10. Now maybe I wont see painted blue, green, black, yellow "White Scars" armies.


Some low lights I see.
1. If you play SW or BA. I could see where the dread changes and scout tweaks would give you a case of butthurt. If you don't get a FAQ that's beyond weak.  
2. Many of the formations are far to costly to field for the benefit. I love the terminator strike one. It starts at almost 1100 points though. Ehhh...
3. Raven guard still are the worst chapter. Sorry Sons of Corax.
4. The obvious power build is screaming at us. UM tactics with 2 Demi-Companies and Calgar. That's 3 of one chapter tactic and 2 of the others. ARMY WIDE. Think about that. Oh and the whole army is objective secured. With free transports. Gag...


So why do I care? I play this sweet HH Night Lords army right. Well the reason is I want to start getting into competition play again. Just as a challenge to myself. It'll also give me better access and experience to the ever evolving 40k meta. Which in turn will make me a better player. Also none of these a&*hole tourney organizers will accept 30k armies. Makes me bitter. They are nice guys I don't mean that. I kinda do...

I'll be posting some video reviews to the MasterCrafted Youtube page Friday night/saturday. Please check them out here:
https://m.youtube.com/channel/UCpUodTbAv0XfqvwwG2cBHuA

See you around the way...